I need a prompt back in blogging about things that aren’t baby related so reading Grazia last night I thought I’d borrow their 10 questions. Apparently these are the questions to ask if you really want to get to know someone. Personally I disagree. I want to know: do you drink, do you eat chocolate and do you think Grey’s Anatomy is the greatest medical drama on TV ever. If it’s yes to all three, we’re going to be best buds. If not, I ain’t interested.
Who have you been closest to in your life?
Difficult. I’ve had different close friends all through my life. Now I have my husband, mum & sister who are all very close to me but I can’t speak to any of them about everything. I like my own company and sorting things myself so I’d have to say me. Sad!
What is your earliest memory?
I get confused about memories. Do I actually remember this? Or do I remember being told about it, or seeing the photo? My long term memory isn’t very good so I think it would have to be a dress I had when I was 7 or 8. It was white with waves on and I think it was from France (where we used to go on holiday). It had writing on it: mer (French for sea) and sea and I remember being very excited that put together it sounded like merci! I wasn’t a cool kid…
What’s your biggest fear?
I have lots of very irrational fears. Being eaten by a shark (even in a swimming pool), zombies, asteroids, deadly diseases such as ebola, diseases that turn us into zombies. My nightmares about having to kill Craig and Sam because the zombies are coming are a source of amusement to my friends but I genuinely worry about the zombie apocalypse and end of the world. I cry in bed sometimes panicking about the zombies eating my child or would we wait for the asteroid to hit or kill ourselves? I know, I’m mental.
Sitting in a clean house with my boys watching a film, eating chocolate, lime vodka & diet coke in the fridge for when Sam goes to bed. I like being at home with my family.
What are you best at?
Compartmentalising. If something makes me sad or worried I can just stop thinking about it until I am ready (if at all). It can (and does) make me look hard faced but it’s my way of dealing with it. I don’t like to be emotional in public anymore. I did that when I was younger and it is not becoming.
What do you value in a partner?
Honesty. I can’t abide lies, even little white ones. Nice arms. Height, I don’t like men smaller than me. Generosity, kindness, similar values on child rearing, supportive. I have all of this in my husband, it’s why I married him.
Tell us something that will shock us.
I can’t – my mum reads this.
Ok, keeping it clean – I love Neil Diamond, Jimmy Nail, Helen Reddy and Fleetwood Mac. If I don’t listen to this I’m listen to 90′s Brit Pop. I hate pretty much all modern music.
Describe the last time you remember feeling really happy.
A couple of weeks ago, doing nothing in particular I did have a tiny little cry because I was so happy. I think I was just in the kitchen, Craig & Sam were playing and laughing in the lounge and I thought how perfect everything was. A lovely husband, fantastic son, I’m pregnant again and although we don’t have loads of money or a huge house, or an expensive car, we are happy and content. I love my life with them, they make me happy.
What’s your greatest regret?
I’m not one for regrets. I compartmentalise them (see above) and try never to return to them. Regrets suck energy from you and I don’t see the point.
What’s the one thing you’d change about yourself or your life?
I’d be more confident. I am (contrary to some appearances) quite shy and scared of what people think of me. I honestly believe that if I was more confident, didn’t give a shit what people thought and stood up for myself, I’d be a lot happier in my career and my personal life. I worry too much what people think of me and I don’t like to upset people or rock the boat. This means people take advantage of me and get what they want from me, usually at a detriment to me. I despair at myself sometimes but can’t seem to get out of the rut. Since I’ve been pregnant this time I’ve found I have been a bit more ballsy, standing up for myself and saying no. It’s caused arguments, I didn’t like it. I think I’ll go back to being a walkover and a mug (yes, I have been called both). I need to change. I hate being like this.
So, do you know me better? Would you now like to be my BFF or run for the hills?
It was the zombie admission wasn’t it…